Recovering from unhealthy relationships takes time, and it can be hard not to fall back into old emotional patterns while you heal. One of the reasons for this is the existence of spiritual cords that connect us to those around us.

Spiritual cords are intangible connections that allow energy to flow between two people. When a relationship is healthy, then both parties get the emotional nourishment they need and the cord makes it easier to relate to and understand one another.

When it is unbalanced, then one partner draws too much from the other and the cord becomes an energetic drain. When a relationship ends, the cord may not be severed right away. This can make healing difficult, as the energetic connection still exists even if both people are no longer physically together. Severing the cord makes recovery easier.

Step 1: Recognizing an unhealthy connection.

It can sometimes be hard to tell when a spiritual cord has become a liability. There are several signs to look out for:

Lowered energy levels.
Feeling anxious, on edge, or just "exhausted" by the person the cord connects you to.
Feeling "stuck" in life.
Obsessive thoughts about the other person.
Frequent physical illness.
Unhealthy habits, to self-soothe from the energetic drain.

These are signs that it may be time to sever the cord. Even if you choose not to end the relationship itself, cutting the cord can allow for a fresh start. Like weeding a garden, this makes space for newer (hopefully healthier) energetic ties to form.

Step 2: Ask the right questions.

The next step is to ask yourself if you are ready for the cord to be cut. Sometimes you may hesitate, afraid of losing your connection to the other person. That is okay. Take your time to begin the healing process and get to the point where you are ready to sever the tie and move on.

Step 3: Cutting the cord.

You can cut an energetic tie by visualizing the cord between you and picturing yourself literally severing it with golden scissors. You can take a sea salt or cleansing, restoring herb bath, asking for all draining or unwanted energetic connections to be removed, and for the energy to return to its source. If you prefer smoke cleansing, you can use white sage, lavender, or your favorite clearing herbs.

You can also perform a full cord-cutting ritual. This is best done during a waning or new moon. A waning moon symbolizes the decrease of the connection's power over you, while a new moon symbolizes a fresh, clean start. For this, you will need a white male or female image candle -- choose the gender that best represents you. You will also need a black male or female image candle, to represent the person you are energetically connected to. You will also need a piece of string long enough to tie around each candle with space in the middle, to represent the spiritual cord and a pair of scissors.

At the base of each candle, carve the name of the person it is intended to represent. Tie the string around the middle of each candle. Sit back, and say...

The cord that once bound us, now confounds us.
With wax and string, flame and knife,
I will cut this tie and get on with my life.

Take the scissors in your hand. Touch them to the middle of the string, and say...

I sever all spiritual cords that connect us.
I release us from this tie.
The energetic slate is clean.

Use the scissors to snip the cord. Light the white image candle, representing yourself, and say...

I now recover all the energy that was lost to me.
My aura is clear of all unwanted energetic attachments.
My energy, strength, and power return to me.
I am surrounded by shields of light that no unwanted energy may cross.

Light the black image candle, representing the other person, and say...

I now return all of the energy that you sent to me.
No longer are we energetically connected.
Receive what was once yours.

As the candles burn, take this time to meditate and re-integrate the energy flowing back to you.

Cutting Cords With Saint Michael

Calling upon Saint Michael is another way to help cut energy cords. Saint Michael is a powerful Archangel who works with a sword of light. He can help sever any negative energy attached to your aura

Light a Saint Michael Candle while saying the following prayer...

Archangel Michael, please surround me with your healing light.
Please cut this cord between me and (insert name or situation).
This cord is not serving my highest and greatest good,
And I am ready for it to be removed.

Healthy energetic cords are wonderful, but it is natural for them to wither with time. Knowing how to sever unhealthy spiritual cords is important for reclaiming your energy, healing from relationships, and continuing to better yourself and your life.